About KLS
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I learn by going where I have to go.
What’s madness but nobility of soul
At odds with circumstance? The day’s on fire!
A man goes far to find out what he is—
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.
I’m never exactly certain of how to talk about myself in spaces like this. Where and how do I draw a boundary around me. It is far easier for me inside of a dialog or small group conversation to discuss topics like who-is-kevin-lynn-smith because the presence and inquiry of others helps me to see helps me to under-stand and helps me to respond to who this I exactly is. Unprompted I likely just stare into space and wonder, Who am I?
But regardless of all of that and even with sums of contingency I do have a sense of who I am and so I will try to put something down that may give to you some approximate sense of the sense I have of the person behind all of this. Also I do like to read Abouts on other sites and Abouts in books and Abouts associated with created objects so I hope that this is a small gift to those of you that are like me and also enjoy reading these types of things. Here goes.
Where to begin in my self-disclosure. I could run down through some top-of-mind bullets of “facts”. That might look something like
• i am older than thirty-three younger than ninety-nine • i graduated from a college • and studied abstract sciences of math and computers • i have worked primarily in the “tech” industry • and even co-founded a startup • i’m a dad • my parents both suffered from alcoholism substance abuse & mental illness & this is a source of many of my gifts and traumas • i lived in SF for almost a decade but recently moved • but grew up in the South—SC specifically, a strange place •&c. •etc. • etcetera
But really, what do these facts say about me. I am not sure but I usually exchange this sort of thing depending on context of conversation or presentation or relational essai. I like or am accustomed to trading facts with other people but it always seems a little lackluster a little insufficient a little less than fully human.
So what else can I say about myself. I don’t know who you are the who that is reading this and that gap is a bit awkward but are we ever more than strangers to one another as we trade and exchange our facts and so is this any different. You reading this is a one-way exchange but really is it but also not too different than if you were sitting down next to me and I was speaking to you these same things. All the more when my facts carry coin of economic value. All the more.
Beyond facts I could tell you about what I dream about what I wish were true in the world what I love what I hate what I believe what I wonder. That might look something like
• I hate inequity and oppression and injustice and structural encasing of these things that perpetuate cycles • and therefore also specific categories like white supremacy exploitative capitalism corporatism racism sexism homophobia transphobia & other -isms and -phobias that destroy life• relatedly I love seeing people thrive and fulfill the desires of their hearts and the discoveries of themselves • I wish the world and our society was configured to support all of its members to pursue and to live fulfilling lives and embrace a fuller spectrum of freedom • I dream about a world where our struggles are not against one another not against our planet not against artificial scarcity not fueled by arbitrary religious dogma not competitive by default • I dream about a world where our struggles our challenges are with the inevitable difficulties that come from a human being trying to figure out what they want their life to look like and how they might go about that • I wonder what it would be like to move at lightspeed to be a photon on a long journey through space • I love being with audacious people that are exploring the cracks pushing the boundaries of possibles rebelling against the givens that govern-and-attempt to put human beings into shapes and forms of unnatural fitting • I dream and wonder about scale but not in scale-of-economies type things but in scale-of-thriving type things • I wonder what it would be like to look at life from the outside from the other side from the perspective of death • I love playful curiosity and the joy of figuring out how things work•I believe that kindness compassion prosociality mutuality nonviolence and the like are essential to creating a viable future for our species • &c.
And more lots and lots more along these trajectories. I’m certain that these dreams beliefs desires hopes and hates will surface throughout the things that I put on this site. And in many ways this is the boundary about this site that I aim to overflow through myriad attempts to capture & convey these quivering pieces of me.
As perhaps a slim summary I could say that when I sit quietly I see a person that is ambivalent questioning hoping despairing dreaming contradicting plodding as a sort of explorer inventor teacher artist being that tries to meet each day each moment with his deepest depths to amplify the good he sees feels conceives loves.